this will never not be funny.
i can’t actually breathe
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I love puns.
still the best thing to come out of Australia
I would like to nominate this witch for some awards. That’s right; this lady, the candy trolley lady. You know why? This lady is always there, every fudging year, for the kids on the Hogwarts Express. She’s there with her squeaky trolly and her candy and her grey hair and her smile and her repetitive questions every. single. year. Through all of the crazy stuff going on, she’s a constant in these kids’ lives. There’s a nervous first year, going to Hogwarts for the first time? No problem, she offers him candy and that helps his nerves. There’s a sixth year student sitting there in angst over their crush? Have some chocolate, it helps with everything. Harry freakin’ Potter is dealing with who-knows-what at this time in his life? You’d better believe she is fudging there to offer him some candy. And really, if you think about it… Harry owes the candy trolley lady. It’s because of this lady, and the chocolate frogs she was selling, that he first found out about Dumbledore and Nicholas Flamel on that little card. This lady and her trolley and her chocolate frogs indirectly helped Harry against The Dark Lord in his first year at Hogwarts. 10 points to the lady and her trolley. And this witch also attended Dumbledore’s funeral, for the record. How awesome is that? And you know what, I am willing to bet a few galleons that she helped in the Battle of Hogwarts too. She was probably doctoring people up, or walking around handing candy out to people. Yeah. Let’s make that canon, shall we? This lady is a boss in her own right, and I don’t care if she’s one of the “transforming” characters of the movie played by different actresses; hand over the awards to the candy trolley lady character in and of herself, because she deserves some recognition.
what if childbirth is just the pain of the 9 periods you missed
and all this time i thought it was the baby ripping through your vagina
im going to cry
i wore a cheap iron man mask for the heck of it during the summer orchestra camp i was mentoring at but i dIDNt know they were gonna bring in professional photographers do u know what its like finding a pic of urself in a foam mask on the internte that u didnt post there urself
it’s wicked HELLA awesome
tumblr has fallen
david karp is dead
yahoo is coming
your second sentence only has 5 syllables. Haiku fail. Though… they all do have 5, poem pass, haiku fail.
it wasn’t a haiku, it was a harry potter reference:
“the ministry has fallen
scrimgeour is dead
they are coming.”
how the fuck did anyone not get that reference
why is this still getting notes
yeah ur secrets safe with me
I wasn’t listening in the first place
when people ask u sex questions and ur just like
you have not experienced true panic until you come face to face with an overflowing toilet
at a friend’s house
During a fancy party.
And that’s the only bathroom.
And there’s a line.
what depths of hell did you guys spawn from
And they have no plunger anywhere
And you are on your period
I’m so glad flappy bird ended before there was legitimate merchandise made like angry birds